I’ve been seeing volleyball coach for about a month now and even as I warmed up to him I had this doubt in my mind about whether I could love him as much as I loved mystery man. Internally I struggled with that a bit and I found myself comparing the relationships and the way I felt with mystery man versus with volleyball coach. When I was with mystery man, I felt like I was winning in life, because in my own head I thought we were a dynamic duo. We were both entrepreneurs at heart and I thought together we would be amazing. In reality though, no two relationships will ever feel the same. Every relationship that I’ve let go of will have a dynamic that I will never have again with anyone else. The way that I feel with any one of my past partners will never be replicated again with another person because it is the experiences that we had together that creates the relationship, the bond. The reason I think about this relationship with mystery man because it was the closest, and the last relationship that I had held dear to me.
Volleyball coach does a great job of thinking of me and putting me first. He is consistent and he always reassures me that he cares about me and that I matter to him. The more time I spend with him, the more I realize that he is what I’ve wanted. He complements me in a way that makes me feel more rounded. He is not just more of what I am. I am dynamic, fast-paced, spontaneous, ambitious and full of ideas. He is stable, responsible, caring, rational, but in a way that doesn’t clash with me and at the same time he able to see me for who I am. Where I am a clumsy and aloof, he is coordinated and nurturing. He is so many things that I cannot be. After dating for just one month, I know it feels premature to say this but I already know that he is the one that I’ve been waiting for.