I went on a date today with the Old School Man, and this is the first official date since Mystery Man and I have broken up. I met Old School Man on the new dating app called Coffee Meets Bagel. He seems to have it together, with friends, his own place and a stable career.
Old School Man came to pick me up in his ’93 Corolla and was very gentlemanly. He came around to open the door for me and I felt good about it. Old School Man has a cute dimply smile, and is gracefully bald. He is also really short at 170cm, which I expected since he was upfront about it in his profile. He did a good job picking out the coffee place and I was impressed with that.
It was a long coffee date and we talked a lot. I couldn’t help but just pick him apart. He was genuinely interested in my work, and he talked a lot about his work. Turns out, he works 12 hours a day on average, voluntarily. He says that he is the type that takes longer to do his work, but he is proud of it. That immediately tell me that he has vested himself heavily in his work, and that he isn’t the type for being efficient about things. This just doesn’t jive with my personality. I’m not the type that takes it slow and steady… I preach efficiency. Not to mention that it would be difficult to have a relationship with someone that feels it necessary to work 12 hour days.
He’s a few years older than me at 33, but he doesn’t seem to be very mature for his age. It seems he lived a very sheltered life at home with his parents (having moved out just 2 months ago). He doesn’t seem very good with cleaning. He has his younger half-brother move in with him, and his brother has been tasked with cleaning because he is living rent-free. Apparently his younger brother also helps him prep food.
I already knew he was in the dark ages when it comes to technology, and I was trying to be open minded about it but then I saw how much it has negatively impacted his life and he doesn’t even know it. For example, he doesn’t want to risk using his real cellphone at the gym because he safeguards it with 2 cases at all times, so he uses his friend’s old iPhone. The iPhone is so old that the timer rounds up to the nearest minute, which doesn’t work well with his exercises. This all can be avoided if he just uses his real phone or downloads a new app on the old iPhone… except he doesn’t want to sign up for an Apple account. I have a feeling that this man makes his life unnecessarily difficult like this on the regular. This is not the only example that I can recall at the moment.
The rest of the time he talked about his special diet of boiled vegetables and making sure he drinks 10 cups of water a day. He seems really proud of this and I was just wondering why he was talking about it, but in retrospect I respect that he takes care of his body… although I can think of better ways to do it.
Overall he seems like someone who is really loyal, trustworthy and someone who is actually willing to put in the effort despite his comment on the 12 hour work days. Actually, he is totally someone that seems to be ready to start a family too and he mentioned that he was crazy about babies recently. I like all of these things about him, but I also don’t feel like he has enough life experience, and we might not agree on fundamental things like how to manage money and frankly, I’m not sure if I can stand watching him do things his way.
Is it worth a second date? Honestly, if he was just a tad more physically attractive, I would say yes, except that is another thing that I’m also not so sure about. When it comes down to it, he is short, bald and the random hairs on his wrist makes me think it is indicative of his lack of grooming elsewhere. He seems rather clueless about fashion and I also wonder if he’s ever been in a real relationship before.