Mystery man is not much of a looker, actually he looks quite repulsive, but I’m into him because of his confidence and the way he carries himself. He has focus on life and a passion for his career. I find that this is true in all of the men that I find myself falling for. This is the first time that I am noticing this trend, I just thought that I was just falling for the good looking assholes.
This air of confidence and self-drive is what I need more of in myself, and so I’ve decided to work on that personally. I realize that I’ve made so many mistakes in life by gravitating to those with confidence and conviction rather than those who actually really cared for me. I had so many girlfriends that opened themselves up to me, and I just closed them off because I was blind to their willingness to be my friend.
I’ve written about how time and time again I picked the wrong guy because I pick the one who is overly confident and overly focused on himself. I thought that it was their looks that gave them this confidence , but really, as mystery man has proved, looks don’t have much to do with these wrong choices.
As I push myself forward, and find myself in these road forks, I will consciously make the right decision. I will pick those who care about me and my well being as opposed to those who I admire for their confidence and focus.
Right now, this choice is actually quite simple, but still rather difficult for me. There is mystery man, who I’m emotionally attached to due to our physical interactions and my attraction to him for his confidence. He hasn’t made a true effort to speak to me since our hookup. Then there’s dog lover man who I’ve reconnected with through an online dating website. He’s putting a ton of effort into our first date.
It’s black and white on paper, but in my head I am gravitating towards mystery man. But for once in my life, I want to make the right decision.